ver since I have come back to Pakistan. I am not only confronting the cultural shocks but, all sorts of frustrations in the guise of different forms. Mostly I am asked why I didn’t stay there, and I should not have come back to Pakistan. Secondly, why I have again rejoined Geo Television after spending a fellowship year in the US not only in J-School but also in CNN. I never imagined in the US that people in my country would ask me all those questions which reveal their concern for me yet, also make me frustrated. I know they also have respect for my achievement but, I don’t know what to do in return to their queries.
To the first question, I answer that I was selected from Pakistan on the US State Department Fellowship and I didn’t have any basis to stay beyond the designated period as this was my rather basis of all fellows’ selection. So, I was not having any moral grounds to stay beyond my stipulated time. I still abhor the friendship and fellowship of all my friends there. I am thankful to their love and affection. Also it was my commitment with my family to come back and spend the family time with them, which is irreplaceable in this world.
The answer to the second question is why I have rejoined Geo and not other channel. It was also my commitment with my channel and with my talk show to rejoin them. I am brought up in a manner that my parents have always taught me to respect the person who holds your finger and teaches you to walk. I am thankful to my parents to teach me all the values which are not based on materialism but, regard and kindness. It doesn’t mean that I belong to a rich family, but from a middle class family, where values and morality hold more weight than wealth. So, answer to this question lies in above mentioned point.
This country where I was born and my trip to the US was the first ever International visit. While I was in the US, many times I reminded of all the injustification my father had faced. Being the only child of his parents, becoming orphan at the age of 16 and robbed of the right of ownership of two homes one was of ancestors and other one was my grandmother’s. The reason of losing the right to the home of ancestors was his first cousins who were two brothers and they expelled my mother and grandmother when my father was out of Pakistan. Ever since, we have been living in rented homes. He lost the right to second home, when my widowed-grandmother rented her home and when one day, he borrowed some money from her tenant , who asked her to give thumb impression on a page which were the papers declaring him owner of the house.
My father has been fighting the case since 25 years but still to no avail. I have made many reports and produced many shows where problems of the people are solved afterwards, but I can’t do anything for my father.
I remembered all these and much more , but even then all this couldn’t keep me away from coming back to my county. But, what I am facing now propels me to think contrary to that. I am thankful to God for being so merciful and giving me the privilege to study in the US university and work in CNN. Its all his grace.
I know the solution of every problem but I don’t know how to answer the questions of people which just make me frustrating and depressing every day.
Lubna Thomas Benjamin 